On October the 11th my husband Nick and I will celebrate our first year of marriage. I can say with all honesty that marriage has been great for me. Our relationship began four years before we married. Although we lived together for most of those years, I get a good feeling, one I never had before the ceremony, when I look down at my left hand and see the ring that symbolizes our commitment to each other. Getting there — planning our wedding — was one of the most difficult things I’ve ever done, though. I know this makes me lucky, but still, putting together the wedding you want with the budget you have is no easy feat. I thought it was going to be a piece of cake. I wanted a simple wedding. Let me tell you — if you want skin free of stress-induced acne on your wedding day, get professional help!
Even though I was stubborn and didn’t except enough help, my wedding was exactly what I wanted. The one area where I made off extremely well was my dress. I’ve never been able to see myself in a princess style gown with a full skirt, but my biggest problem was I just couldn’t bring myself to go into David’s Bridal. As weird of a confession as it may be for a wedding photographer, I guess I have a bridal shop phobia. I have no explanation, it’s just how I am. I shopped online. David’s Internet offerings came in puffy skirt and extra puffy skirt last year. Other places with online shopping were mostly department stores that carry designer dresses with price tags that would have left me with no money to pay for the ceremony. So, against the advice of every person I respect, I wrote down all big dress designers I love and plugged them into an eBay search. About for pages in to a Vera Wang search, I saw my dress. Simple andelegant Vera style in a wedding dress size six, the right size. It had never been worn and still had the tags on. I got it, my perfect designer dress at a fraction of the cost.
If you’re very careful, eBay or a consignment shop can be a godsend for your budget. Many of us can’t afford to be extravagant, even on the most important day of our lives. With some searching and luck we can fool even ourselves. Another friend of mine found her perfect dress at a second-hand shop. While some are afraid of a second-hand wedding dress, it hasn’t had any ill effect on either of our marriages. I’m even willing to bet that not going into debt for our wedding has saved us from a lot of money squabbles with our spouses. When it comes to getting what you want at a price you can afford, it’s worth it to keep you options open.
If you do eBay your dress, here are a few things to be careful of. Not long after my dress came in the mail I read a newspaper article on fraud and eBay. There some awlful people out there who write losing bidders pretending to be the seller of the item the bidder wanted. In the e-mail they say the winner could not pay for the item so it is now up for grabs to the second-highest bidder. Since they never had the item in the first place, they just take your money and run. This can be devastating, especially for someone wanting a big ticket item like a wedding dress. Don’t let a few rotten eggs keep you from getting your dress, if that’s where you find it. I have no regrets from buying my dress on eBay, and I think if other people are cautious, they can be equally satisfied. Just make sure that the e-mail address from anyone claiming to have the item you want is the same as the one listed on the item’s seller page and you should be safe. For me it worked out better than settling for a dress I really wasn’t comfortable in.
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